I recently had to attend a class, having been caught speeding earlier in the year. The class was valuable and has already changed my habits, in part because I was reminded of the serious consequences of not driving carefully, with due consideration for others.
One of the tools offered to the class was the acronym COAST. There are more than 40 such acronyms, but this one is as relevant to resolving disputes as it is to driving.
Concentrate - focus and remove any distractions, both internal and external. I find it hard not to have conversations with myself and this almost always means I miss something important along the way. Be ready and well prepared in order to concentrate when first engaging with those in dispute.
Observe - watch what is happening; I work hard to keep my peripheral vision open rather than closed or reduced, in order that I can see what is happening outside my immediate area of focus. Typically my peripheral vision closes or reduces when I am tired or stressed. It's less dangerous than when driving, but still has an impact when resolving a dispute.
Anticipate - what is happening, what is going to happen and where are surprises likely to emerge? This is, in part, a process of risk identification and management. I try to remain open to possibilities and events, and not make assumptions based on past experience or bias. With age, it is remarkably difficult not to make assumptions based on experience...
Some degree of self-insight is valuable in order to know how one is going to react - I can react badly when dealing with those who have e.g. been bullying or harassing others which isn't helpful when resolving disputes and I need to anticipate my reactions accordingly.
Space - make good use of the space created as a result of the above and so I literally no longer need to slam on the brakes when something happens which is out of my control.
Time - make time as a result of the above and take advantage of it. Don't rush to conclusions but don't hang around either. I find it useful to have a keen sense of pace and the back-and-forth-ness of discussions when working with those in dispute.
An intuitive appreciation of what is happening with a capacity to improvise and be open to possibility is valuable.
So too is having a tool to provide structure to such activities.
From here to there, but this time not at speed.